Top Ten Signs You're at a Bad McDonald's

1. Your "Quarter Pounder" has a long, thin tail.
2. The kid serving you has grill marks on his forehead.
3. Sign out front reads, "No shirt, no shoes, no reason you can't get a job here."
4. Their Mayor McCheese was caught in a hotel room smoking crack.
5. Blocking drive-thru is the bloated body of Wendy's founder Dave Thomas.
6. Manager takes a bite out of every burger to make sure it's okay.
7. In his photo, employee of the month is holding a mug shot number.
8. You spill vanilla shake and it burns a hole right through your pants.
9. A guy dressed as Ronald McDonald keeps asking to touch your food.
10. Their slogan: "Did somebody say 'E Coli'?"